More on Drift

I often cite one of my favorite blogs, The Happiness Project, on this blog.  Today the Happiness author reposts a list of indicators for “drift” and it’s worth reposting:

A few weeks ago, I wrote about the problem of “drift” – the decision you make by not deciding, or by making a decision that unleashes consequences for which you don’t take responsibility.

The responses I got – comments on my blog, in my email, and on theFacebook Page – showed me that a lot of people have also suffered from drift.

One of the problems of drift is that we try to deny we’re drifting. Take this quiz: how many of these statements apply to you, in your current situation? The more checks you make, the greater your risk for being adrift.

__ I often have the peculiar feeling that I’m living someone else’s life.
__ I often think, “This situation can’t go on,” but then it does go on.
__ I spend a lot of time daydreaming about a completely different life as an escape from what I’m doing now.
__ I find myself getting very angry if someone challenges the values that I think I’m working toward. (E.g., working like crazy as a fifth-year associate at a law firm, and furious if someone argues that money and security aren’t important.)
__ I complain about my situation, but I don’t spend much time trying to figure out ways to make it better. In fact…
__ I fantasize that some catastrophe or upheaval will blow up my situation. I’ll break my leg or get transferred to another city.
__ I find myself having disproportionate reactions. (For example, I have a friend who wasn’t admitting to herself that she wanted to be an actor, and she decided to give it a shot after she started crying when someone started talking about acting.)
__ I feel like other people or processes are moving events forward, and I’m just passively carried along.
__ I find myself doing or getting something because the people around me are doing it or want it.
__ There is something in my life about which I used to be passionate, but now I never allow myself to indulge in it. In fact, it makes me uncomfortable even thinking about it.
__ I’ve justified certain actions on my part by assuring myself, “I might as well,” “It can’t hurt,” “This might be useful,” “This will keep my options open,” “I can always decide later,” “I can always change my mind,” “Nothing is forever,” “How bad can it be?”

I’m 26 and with this economic climate, in this city, it’s easy to stay in a state of constant transition.  I relish transition—I find it cathartic—but there’s definitely always potential for toxic “drift.”  I like these quasi-objective checklists for keeping yourself sane.

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  1. Pingback: Bashert « Unkategorized

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